Back to being a technophobe. Going away from Foxhole News and H. for a while. I am so behind on jazzing up this blog. I’m even finding difficult to get help with the computer formats, etc. But I’m also becoming aware that people don’t know as much as they pretend on computers. One guy recently said he didn’t know about Apple. Even I don’t see how that can be an excuse. They seem so similar to me.

Anyway one thing I wanted to blab about was a book I’ve been reading, A House in the Sky. This woman Amanda Lindhout was looking for adventure and she got what she wished for. I couldn’t put the book down. She talks about one time out of many when she was being raped by one of her Somali captors. As she brace against him with her arms between their chests, she felt a flood of empathy for the horrible life HE had had in a war-torn country.

That’s what I do all day: read. When I say read, I don’t mean that I read romance novels. Since I was about 25 years old, I suddenly stopped reading fiction. I remember probably the first non-fiction book I read was about Edith Piaf, written by her sister. I was in France reading the book in French, so that helped me learn a foreign language, but it also made me gravitate to biographies, history, social sciences, etc.

Between reading I watch TV. Probably some people think I watch too much. Gael doesn’t even own a TV. I find it keeps me company. So just now I was flipping to
Fox. I see H. getting totally brainwashed by Fox. Right now they are pushing their agenda against Biden.

I can see nothing to criticize about the man. He’s fairly eloquent. He doesn’t lie. He made some great decisions. The stock market is up (although too slow, in my opinion).

Some of these Repub’s were predicting anarchy in the streets. Fox still foments hate. Hate against Biden. Hate against communism (?). They even say Double Downer could have done Afghanistan better. Well, he had his chance. Coulda, woulda, shoulda.

I will continue to show you the lies that organization has spread as I continue. But signing off now to teach myself computer skills.

So as I continue how Fox News ruined my friend, I have to point out that H. is good person to talk to. I never feel the need to censor my thoughts. Also, we originally met to play chess. At first H. was reluctant. It had been a long time since he played. I was losing my original skill also. The first three times we played, H. won two out of three times. The first time, I beat him with the Fool’s Mate, but he quickly got much better. One of his winning strategies was playing dumb. He would pretend he didn’t know what to move next. I would help him make some moves. This caused my own concentration to wane. We stopped playing because I would get so angry with his stubborn ways, and also, he was getting better at chess as I was losing my skills.

I was already losing with Craig every time, so it was getting hard to find an evenly matched opponent. There were many other things I admired H. about. In some instances he seemed to be a good negotiator. I told him he was a much better negotiator than Double Downer. That was one reason I could not understand H.’s overwhelming adoration for the man. As time went by, H. grew more and more in love with D.D. I told H. he would suck his dick if he were allowed to. H. didn’t respond to that one.

Over time H. did swallow every lie that was put out by the Repub. party. I am aware of the difference between a fact and a lie, but H. still couldn’t, grasp it.

To continue…

As I was writing my last story about how Fox News ruined my friend, H., I did some research on statistics that H. and I had been discussing on abortion. Well, I knew that the number of abortions performed on black and women of color was three to five times greater than those performed on white women, I started to question that H. was against abortion because it was killing white babies.

I tried to explain that the percentages of something are different from just adding up the total number. I suspected Fox News was flashing total sums on their biased screens. This would show the total number of abortions for white women as larger than the total for black women, but if you look at the percentage, you would get a lower number.

Since H. was quite skilled in automotive mechanics, I said it was like the difference between looking at your odometer and your speedometer. I think he understood. At least it ended the discussion about abortion.

It didn’t end the discussion about race relations. You can imagine that H. will never admit to being racist. We have a mutual acquaintance, C. who is a black woman. One time about five years ago, H. told me about an argument the two of them were having. C. called H. a racist (I agree). But H. called C. a racist right back. Does this remind you of elementary school?

I tried to shed some light by pointing out that to me being a racist is different from being prejudiced. Prejudice is a thought process that is tied up with bias, and can be partly unconscious, whereas racism is more of a behavior that is shown by words and actions. You still won’t hear that distinction on Fox. They are all so busy saying they are not racist, while betraying their true thoughts with the words that betray them.

When Double Downer was elected president in 2016, H. was not happy with him. He actually seemed depressed. He said D.D. was ruining the Republican Party. I didn’t quite absorb this at the time. I couldn’t imagine the extant to which lawyers, legislators, etc. could lie so much to follow the stupidest man I have ever seen. And, by the way, I used to give I.Q. tests. I’m still searching for an instance of any wisdom in that brain. Is there? If you can’t admit your mistakes and change course, you are in danger of going off the cliff.

Will continue…

OK, I’m back at ya. If anyone is even reading this blog, you have a lot of patience. I feel like a baby with the digital world.

But I still have stuff to talk about.

Since “Double Downer” lost the election, I feel relieved. Sometimes when I talked to Republicans, I doubted my own sanity. But the people who were not in his cult were agreeable. Since we think along the same lines, there is nothing to argue about, which is OK. I used to like discussions, arguments, etc., but if you can not agree on basic facts…

Anyway, for the last ten years or so, I have been a troglodyte with a book. I have read so many mind-changing books, and one leads to the next one. Two of the most recent have been Survival of the Friendliest, which really speaks to the social psychologist in me, and the Mine, which speaks to the wanna-be lawyer in me.

I have been depressed for about a week now. I have a frenemy, H., a Rapublican. I used to like talking with him, because I just could not get it through my head why half the country believes the lies put out by some right wing channels. I told H., point out just one lie about the Dems. Because I can show you many lies that Fox tells. I can easily see these lies because of my background in statistics. I realize now he actually doesn’t know the truth because he doesn’t know the difference between a fact and an opinion. Nor does he know how to research a fact, even by going to Google.

So I used to wonder if he was really trying to get to the truth or just make points. I used to wonder if he is so attached to his opinion that he will “cheat” by lying. Or constantly talk over me and interrupt me. I asked him to not interrupt me, and he actually started to make an effort. But still I told him last Friday that I didn’t want to talk politics any more. I was losing my patience.

For about 15-20 minutes we talked everyday talk. Then as he was leaving he brought up something about the journalist who asked Double Downer about the number of COVID cases. I said that I saw how the journalist caught Double Downer trying to give him a piece of paper showing some phony stats. I tried to explain what was probably the false stats. You would think that this should never have happened with H. Why? Because I had just asked NOT to talk politics, and because you’d think H. would defer to my better knowledge of stats.

I felt ambushed by H. and I also realize that he is swimming in lies, and therefore cannot tell the difference. The whole situation knocked me back for a few days. But this type of interaction isn’t helping my moods, post Prozac.

I’m experiencing some pretty radical chemical changes lately. Got at least a month now I have gradually weaned myself off Prozac. I took my last pill early July. Before when I tried to come off it, I would get very cranky and cry at the smallest upset. Right now I feel like nothing could bother me. I gave Prozac the major reason for my ability to quit heron in 1996. Plus a few other factors, like moving away from Orange County.
Another reason is I have a great man in my life. Craig and I have our own comedy team like Burns and Allen. We are each other’s backboard as we play ping pong with witty remarks. It is so great to have someone who is on the same wavelength as yourself.
The other day I was studying my Logic Textbook to teach myself. I took the class at UCLA in the late 60’s with Donald Kalish. Even though I had a crush on him, the subject was too hard for me to keep up with. As Craig and I were sitting side by side, I was trying to explain truth tables to him. By I had to keep looking back a few pages in the book. Even though I must have sounded like a confused person, he patiently waited while I tried to figure it out. What patience. We learn from each other.

In 2016 I experienced entering the Twilight Zone. First was my battle with Anasa which I will discuss in future posts. But it’s a long story. Second I couldn’t understand politics. Now I am obsessed with politics, and I don’t even want to be. The main thing I can’t grasp is how so many people can follow such a windbag liar. I’ll call him Donald Duck.
Mostly I see a lot of bragging which I find boring. He ain’t pretty. He’s uneducated, simple-minded, etc. Why do these people believe him? I think I just realized he is a good liar. First, he got almost half of the American population to believe Obama was born in Kenya. Now he continues to spew illogic. He contradicts himself. Not my kind of guy.
Not that I haven’t lied plenty myself, as my high school roommates and classmates can attest (Pat, Vicky, Jenny, Gael). It was only as I began to quit using heroin the I promised myself to avoid lying. I couldn’t stop my addiction, but I could change my character, change my intentions, and change the way I talked to people.
I started to watch how lawyers interact. The way they avoid outright lying.
The many different ways a person can shade the truth if they want to. I discovered it is better to not lie in the first place.
I read that Nixon liked to lie. Why? It seems like a lot of work to me to lie on purpose.

I just watched Colbert.  I expected comedy and I saw a journalist confront John Bolton.  I admire Stephen Colbert for pulling the covers of Bolton.  Colbert sounded like a brilliant lawyer.  Still Bolton won't put his money where his mouth is, if he won't vote for a Dem. He can take his marbles and go home.

Do you know how hard it is to navigate these websites.  I have an M.A. (Jill of all trades, Master of Arts) but I find computers bewildering.  By the time I get creative, WordPress has put all these icons and instructions in my way.

I want to use this blog to follow up on my previous blog: Methadonian.  I plan to repeat the stories I have told of my adventures in recovery on methadone.  Also I just want to vent about current events.  Also I spend most of my time reading, usually non-fiction.  Right now I am self-studying logic, a class I failed at UCLA.  Now that I’m older it makes more sense to me.